I have an 8 1/2 year old going on 13. She is really starting to test the waters with her big toe. She has always been a rules follower and stubborn.
When I was a kid they called this pre-teen. Now they call it tween. tween (twn) n.A child between middle childhood and adolescence, usually between 8 and 12 years old.
Yesterday we had a very tween moment. We were in the car and my 6 year old was fussing about something happening at school. She was mimicking him and rolling her eyes. He (dramatic) started tearing up and asked her to please stop teasing him. She continued to harass him.
I then (laryngitis) motioned for her to stop and was ignored. I pulled over and parked.
"What are you doing mommy?"
(whispers) "I am parking until you can be kind to your brother."
"Mommy you are hurting the environment."
(whispers) "Then apologize to your brother."
"No. I didn't do anything wrong."
(whispers) " Then we sit here and wait."
"But you are hurting the environment."
(whispers) "No, you are by not apologizing."
Tears and jeers incur.
Drive the 20 feet into my garage.
Slamming of doors and stomping occur. Then:
"I said I am sorry to save the environment because I care about that the most in the world. I am NOT sorry on the inside! You just wanted to be mad at me!"
(whispers) "Okay then lets go stand in the corner until you feel calm enough to feel sorry on the inside."
"FINE! I AM GOING TO BE THERE UNTIL MIDNIGHT!"
(whispers) "What ever floats your boat. It is your choice."
"NO IT ISN'T! YOU ARE THE ONE MAKING ME ACT LIKE THIS!"
(whispers) "No I can't make you act up. Stand in the corner until you can gather yourself together."
She stomps over to the corner. She stands there for fifteen min with her arms crossed. I started to sweat it because that seems like a long time. But then I started thinking that if I can't out stubborn her she will then start to push her boundaries further.
Now thirty minutes have passed. She was still looking just as stubborn. She said, "I am angry. I am going to stand here all night!"
Tick-tock. I started thinking about how bad I feel. Am I being mean? Is she learning a lesson? Crap am I bad mom?
Ten minutes later she walks over with somber eyes. She climbs into my lap and says, "I am sorry mommy. I won't act like that again. I know I was making bad choices. Sometimes I just get so mad on the inside."
Then we kissed and made up and had a cuddle time that lasted as long as the time out.